The Devil's Rose's blog

2006-10-31 3:46 p.m.

I remember when...

So, today I'm listening to:

"Days of the Phoenix"
I remember when
I was told a story of crushed velvet, candle wax, and dried up flowers.
The figure on the bed,
All dressed up in roses, calling...
Beckoning to sleep...
Offering a dream.

The words were as mystical as purring animals.
The circle of rage...
The ghosts on the stage appeared.
The time was so tangible
I'll never let it go.
Ghost stories handed down,
Reached secret tunnels below.

No one could see me.

I fell into yesterday.
Our dreams seemed not far away.
I want to, I want to, I want to stay
I fell into fantasy.

The words were as mystical as purring animals.
The circle of rage...
The ghosts on the stage appeared.
The time was so tangible
I'll never let it go.
Ghost stories handed down,
Reached secret tunnels below.

No one could see me.

I fell into yesterday.
Our dreams seemed not far away.
I want to, I want to, I want to stay.
I fell into fantasy.


The girl on the wall always waited for me,
And she was always smiling.
The teenage death boys
The teenage death girls...
And everyone was dancing.
Nothing could touch us then,
No one could change us then,
And everyone was dancing.
Nothing could hurt us then,
No one could see us then,
And everyone was dancing.
Everyone was dancing.

No one could see me.

I fell into yesterday.
Our dreams seemed not far away.
I want to, I want to, I want to stay.
I fell into fantasy.

Our dreams seemed not far away.
Our dreams seemed not far away.
Our dreams seemed not far away.

I fell into fantasy.

One of the assignments at my school for the core class at my individual college is that you have to do a sustainability project. Mine consisted of going to the school's organic farm and harvesting green beans.

After all, what better way to celebrate an ancient harvest festival then to go a-harvesting?

But yeah. It just reminded me of going grocery shopping with the friends.

And then the weather started to shift. It got breezier, cloudier, cooler...and the air began to smell like ocean. In short, it was the exact same weather we had the last time my friends and I went cavorting about the seaside.

It seems like everything here is a constant reminder of everything that I left behind to come here.

AFI's frontman never gives out the meaning of his lyrics. In an interview I saw once while casually flipping through a magazine on break at work, he said it's because he wants his lyrics to be meaningful to everyone, not just those who have experienced whatever he's directly referencing.

I definitely have an interpretation of the Days of the Phoenix. But lately, that interpretation is shifting.

The past is safe. Even when it's fraught with danger, it's still safer than the unknown that is the present. No one could change us then.

We're changing without each other. We no longer go to each other first when something momentous happens, because we lack the context with which to understand why something is momentous. We now have long, awkward silences in our phone and IM conversations because we're losing common ground.

Discussions now turn to what was, rather than what is.

I hate when my friendships decay. I just hope to god that this doesn't rot straight through.

I remember when Halloween would be a say that we'd all skip school on to hang out and get ready. And then we'd trick or treat until the blisters came up on our feet, regardless of being "too old". And then we'd spend the night together, watching movies and telling stories and planning the next year's Halloween.

I never felt too old for Halloween before. But now I do. And it no longer feels like a holiday of innocent fun, favorite holiday or not, because we're all separated, which is killing the fun and reminding me that we're not little kids any more, no matter what we say or do.

--Rose

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About Me

I'm just an average 19 year-old girl from California, trying to figure out my place in the world. Madness and mayhem prevail in my existence as I navigate university life and try to figure out just what I want from myself. It's an interesting adventure. Want to know anything about me, just ask.

The Devil's Rose

Because I'm always curious where people get their screennames from, here's why mine's 'devils-rose': one of my favorite songs is called "Rose in the Devil's Garden" by Tiger Army. That's the main reason, that and my life can be quite hellish. So it just kind of worked for me.

The Least You Need to Know

I am: crazy; nineteen; female; random; deeply loyal to my friends; always looking to make more friends; something of a warrior, when the situation calls for it; good in emergencies; until they're over; temperamental; creative, artistic, and social; escaping an emotionally abusive childhood; determined to move to Europe; in a major university; studying Linguistics, Japanese, German, and Spanish; and...I don't know, lots of things. :D

Likes/Dislikes

I like: music, concerts, road trips, food, friendship, laughter, frolicking, walking in nature, writing novels and short stories, reading fiction - mostly fantasy, dancing in the rain, late nights, sleeping in, thunderstorms, ogling cute boys, playing at being a pirate, outrunning time, feeling infinite.
~*~
I dislike: homework, waking up early, hot weather, people with no sense of humor, boredom, depression, being at home with my family.

NANOWRIMO

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